Title: Love Makes Ya Do the Wacky
Author: Trinity Day
E-mail: trinityday@hotmail.com
Homepage: http://www.dazzled.com/trinity;
http://alienattraction.tripod.com
Disclaimer: Roswell and its characters do not belong to me
Rating: PG
Distribution: Ask, please.  I'll probably say yes anyways, but it's polite to ask.
Author's Notes:  This was written for the crazy challenge were the weirdest couples get together.  The weirder, the better

Liz giggled as the man who occupied her heart kissed her good night. After he left, Liz took out her journal and began to write about her wonderful day.

"Liz," an urgent stage whisper reached her from the street below.

Liz leaned over the balcony and saw Max looking up to her from the street below.

"Max," she said surprised. "What are you doing here?"

Without waiting to be invited, Max climbed the ladder up to her. "I had to get out of my house. Michael and Isabel are driving me crazy."

"What are they doing?"

A pained look fell across Max's face. "I don't want to know. Isabel *is* my sister, after all. All I know is that they've been locked in Isabel's room for hours. I've heard banging and a lot of giggling. Needless to say, I couldn't stay at my house listening to that any longer."

Liz's jaw dropped. "Isabel and Michael?" she asked, dumbfounded. "I didn't know they were . . . "

"Neither did I," Max admitted. "So what have you been up to?"

"Nothing," Liz said very quickly.

Max looked at her suspiciously. "I thought you and Maria were going to a movie."

"Oh yeah," Liz said. "Yeah, we went to a movie."

"What movie?" Max asked.

"What is this, the Spanish Inquisition?" Liz demanded.

Max looked baffled. "I just wanted to know what movie you saw."

"Well maybe it's none of your business," Liz snapped.

"Fine," Max said angrily. Now he looked hurt. "Maybe I should go."

"Maybe you should," Liz agreed.

Max left and Liz opened up her diary again. "I hope he doesn't suspect anything," she said to herself.

"Do you think we should talk?" Maria asked between hot and furious kisses.

"Talk?" Alex took his lips off of Maria long enough to ask. "Talk about what?"

"I don't know. Stuff."

"No."

"No?" Maria shrieked. She pulled away from Alex's embrace and hit him.

"You're just like Michael. You just want a physical relationship, not an emotional one."

"That's not true," Alex said, trying to smooth things over. "If I wanted a physical one, I wouldn't be going out with you." He leaned in to kiss her again.

Instead Maria slapped him. "Bastard! What did you mean by that? Do you think I'm ugly?"

Realizing he had said a very stupid thing, Alex tried to convince Maria that wasn't what he meant. "I don't think you're ugly. I think you're beautiful. I think you're gorgeous. I simply meant that I would never go out with someone as wonderful as you if I just wanted sex. You're too perfect for me not to want to have an emotional relationship with."

Maria melted at his words. "Do you really mean it?"

"Of course," Alex murmured. He started to kiss Maria again and this time she let him.

"Do you think I'm prettier than Isabel Evans?"

"Of course," Alex answered, but it was too late. He had hesitated for a fraction of a second. Maria, of course, had noticed this.

"Asshole!" she yelled. She slapped him again and stormed off.

Alex was left behind wondering how he had managed to mess up so badly in so short a time.

"Women," he snorted derisively.

After Maria stormed away from Alex she wandered around Roswell, not caring that it was after curfew and she could get in trouble for being out.

She was walking very fast, hoping it would keep her from crying. It wasn't working too well. Tears were streaming down her cheeks.

The last person she expected to run into was Max Evans. She literally ran into him, too. She turned around a corner and hit him straight on. They both fell to the ground.

"Maria?" Max asked, sounding astounded when he recognized the person who had knocked him over.

"Max?" Maria asked, just as surprised.

Then together they said, "What are you doing here?"

"Are you crying?" Max asked, noticing her tears.

Maria nodded miserably.

"Then you heard about Michael and Izzy," Max concluded.

"I heard what about them?" Maria asked suspiciously.

Max looked like a deer caught in headlights. "Nothing," he quickly said.

"No, what about Michael and Isabel."

Max winced. "They're kind of a . . . thing."

"A thing?" Maria asked.

"Well, they're sleeping together. I'm sorry, I shouldn't've mentioned it. I thought you knew."

"It's okay," Maria said shrugging.

Max stared at her, shocked at her indifference. "You're not upset?"

"No, why should I be?"

"Because you and Michael and madly in love with each other."

"Where'd you get that idea?" Maria asked puzzled at why Max would think that.

He stared at her oddly again. Then he shook his head. "Never mind. Why were you crying then?"

Maria sniffed. "Because Alex thinks Isabel is prettier than I am," she wailed.

"Why should you care about what Alex thinks?" Max wanted to know.

"Because," Maria started, a dreamy look in her eyes, "Alex is the most wonderful person you have ever seen. He's handsome and smart and oh-so sexy."

Max winced at the mental image. "Not that I disagree, but what brought this on? I though you and Alex were just friends."

Maria shrugged. "I don't know," she said. "I just suddenly realized that he was so . . . perfect. And dreamy. And sexy. And - "

Max cut her off before she could continue. "I get the picture. Now come on, I need to get you home. It's past curfew and we could get in trouble if we're caught."

Maria frowned slightly. "It is, isn't it. Then what are you doing out?"

Max rolled his eyes. "You know what I said about Michael and Isabel?"

Maria was confused. "That they're a thing?"

Max nodded. "Well, they're kinda over at my house right now, and they aren't exactly being quiet."

"Oh," Maria said, enlightenment dawning on her. She blushed. "What about your parents?"

"They're out at dinner with some clients. They won't be back till late."

"So why are you just wandering around? Why didn't you go to Liz's or something?" Maria asked.

"I did. She was acting rather weird. Is there something going on with her that I don't know about?"

Maria frowned. "With Liz? No. She's fine."

"She's not like, mad at me about something?" Max asked.

Maria laughed. "Don't worry, Max, Liz isn't mad at you. She's completely into you. She hasn't even glanced at another guy in months."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive," Maria reassured him Max was so cute when he was worrying about Liz, Maria thought.

Soon they reached Maria's house. "Here we are," Max said. He walked her up to the front door.

"Thanks for walking me home," Maria said, smiling shyly.

"You're welcome," Max said. They gazed into each other's eyes for a minute until Max suddenly turned his head. "I better go," he muttered, not meeting Maria's eyes.

Maria found herself blushing slightly. She didn't know what had gotten into her. She had been so close to kissing Max. She had almost kissed her best friend's boyfriend. That was definitely bad.

Isabel heard a car pull into her driveway. "Damn," she swore. "My parents are home. You gotta get outta here," she told Michael.

Michael looked faintly hurt. "Why?" he asked. "I'm over here all the time."

"And they think it's to visit Max. If they catch us in here, alone, I'm going to be grounded for the rest of my life!"

Michael just moved in and kissed Isabel again. "They're not going to catch us."

Isabel pushed Michael off of her and onto the floor. "You don't understand. If you stay here, they will catch us." She grabbed a robe and pulled it around her.

"We can just get dressed and pretend we were watching tv," Michael suggested.

"No," Isabel said. "You don't understand. You haven't been allowed in my room since we turned thirteen unless someone else was here." She threw Michael his pants. "Now get dressed and get out."

Giving Isabel a wounded look, Michael put on his clothes. He gave her one last kiss then slipped out the window.

Isabel quickly pulled some clothes on herself and went out to greet her parents. "Hey," she said.

"Hi Isabel."

Her mom looked around. "Is Max already in bed?" she asked.

Isabel glanced over to her brother's room. She hadn't heard him in hours. "I think so," she said.

"Actually," Isabel said. "I just remembered there's something I forgot to do. I'll be back soon." She left, practically running out the door, before her parents could protest.

She took the jeep and quickly overtook Michael. "Hey," she said, as she pulled up to the side of the road. "Need a ride?" She flashed him a winning smile.

He gave her crooked half grin in return and climbed in beside her. "Hank's not around," he whispered in her ear.

Isabel's grin widened. "You read my mind." She shifted into drive and head for Michael's place.



Max wandered through the streets of Roswell. He wondered where he should go. Home was out of the question. He was in no mood to hear his sister having sex with his best friend. He had tried Liz's, but she was acting very weird and had practically kicked him out. Then he had run into Maria, who seemed to be heartbroken over Alex and had almost kissed him when he brought her home. Max shuddered to think who he might run into next and how weird they would be acting.

"Hi, Max," a very feminine voice called out, interrupting Max's reverie. Max turned around. It was Pam Troy, one of his classmates.

"Hi Pam," Max replied. "What are you doing out so late?"

"I could ask you the same. It's after curfew." She walked up to him. "I would've never taken you for the kind of guy who would break curfew."

"I usually don't," Max admitted. Pam took another step towards him, then the next thing he knew, Max was all over her. He kissed her with a furious passion he had never known. She kissed him back, devouring his mouth. 

"Max," she moaned.

Max woke up the next morning with a splitting headache. He moaned as he sat up and held his head until the pain went away. Pam was no where to be seen. He quickly got dressed and left. Wandering aimlessly down the streets of Roswell, he soon found himself in front of Liz's house.

"There he is." Isabel was leaning over the side of the balcony, waving at Max.

"Isabel?" Max asked, stunned. "What are you doing here?"

"Suffering from a horrible headache," Isabel answered. "Now come up."

Max went up and found himself with Isabel, Liz, Maria, Michael, Alex and Kyle. Max was confused. "What are you all doing here?"

"Besides being utterly mortified at our actions," Maria asked dryly.

"We found out why we were acting so weird," Alex told him.

"Why?" Max asked.

"It was something in the water," Kyle said. "Chemical spill, or something. Completely harmless, but a very powerful aphrodisiac. No lasting effects."

Max was stunned. "How'd you find out?"

"It's all over the news," Liz said. Isabel silently handed him the paper and Max looked at the front page. Sure enough, the article confirmed what his friends were telling him.

"So you're saying the reason you guys were acting so weird is because there was something in the water?"

"You catch on fast," Isabel said sarcastically.

"That explains a lot," Max muttered. He eyed Kyle. That still didn't explain why the sheriff's son was here. Unless . . . Max's eyes widened and he from Liz to Kyle to Liz again.

Liz noticed Max's panicked look. She shook her head. Max sighed, relieved that Kyle and Liz hadn't gotten back together, even if it was under the influence of an aphrodisiac.

"So, who were you involved with, Liz," Maria asked.

Liz blushed slightly. "No one," she muttered.

"Yes, you were," Max said. "Something was definitely up with you yesterday when I went to see you."

"Yeah, Liz, you know all about our steamy love affairs. Tell us about yours," Alex begged.

"I don't want to," Liz said stubbornly.

Isabel, who, being bored, had been flipping through Liz's history book, said, "She doesn't need to tell us." She held up the book to a page where Liz had doodled a heard surrounding by the words "Mrs. Elizabeth Valenti."

Kyle looked confused. "It wasn't me. I wasn't with Liz at all."

Then it dawned on everyone and as one they exclaimed, "The Sheriff!" with Kyle saying, "My dad!"

Liz turned beet red and hid her face.

The End